In the last three weeks I've been to Las Vegas twice. My first trip was to participate in the time honored Vegas bachelor party tradition. My second trip was to participate in the time honored Vegas bachelorette party tradition. The first trip was me and nineteen other guys. The second trip was me and four women. I was invited to the first trip because I'm a groomsman. I was invited to the second trip because I'm a bridesmaid. Or, rather, a bridesman. I've never been a bridesman before and still am not quite sure what to expect, other than being able to tell you that, no, thank you for asking, but I will be wearing a tuxedo.
I was very excited about these trips for multiple reasons:
1) I expected to enjoy some spending time in Las Vegas with good friends on both trips.
2) I imagined the nearly-back-to-back Vegas weekends was an excellent opportunity for me to perform an anthropological comparison of gender differences in the wild.
3) I was hoping for some hot girl-on-girl-on-girl-on-girl-on-me action.
Sadly, expectation number three was a bust, but the good news is I had a great time on both trips and also was able to examine first hand the animal we call woman in her native habitat (Vegas bachelorette party). I suppose it is possible that my presence had a Heisenbergy effect on the whole thing and had I not been there the weekend's main activity would have been spontaneous naked pillow fights.
Here are some similarities between bachelor and bachelorette parties:
S1) lots of drinking.
S2) lots of hanging out by the pool.
S3) lots of sleeping late.
S4) lots of food, specifically at the Smith & Wollensky steakhouse.
Here are some differences between bachelor and bachelorette parties:
D1) not quite as much poker playing in bachelorette parties.
D2) at a bachelorette parties the entertainment is more likely to involve Cirque de Soleil or the DVD-game home version of Family Feud.
D3) instead of trying to hit on all bachelorette parties within sight, when you are in a bachelorette party you just hang around and wait for bachelor parties to hit on you.
To elaborate on D3, I have to admit it brought me great evil joy to introduce myself to the bachelor party guys when they came by to hit on the women. It obviously hastened their exit from the scene, sending them off looking for groups with less manly bachelorettes, but in my defense, my bachelorettes were either married, engaged or lesbians and therefore not really interested in meeting bachelors (despite the "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas" mindset). Nothing kills the mood of a bachelor more than when he introduces himself to four lovely women inquires as to their evening only to have a guy wearing a matching lei say rather gruffly, "Yes, we're having about as much fun as five girls can have."
